vale of dreams

n i g h t

Night steals upon us,
afraid lest we see it come,
and laugh, and send it away again,
and entreat the day awhile,
to warm us with its sun.

© copyright Daniel Marr 1995

e y e s o f f i r e

Coming out of the darkness,
I enter the light
of the campfire.
To be surrounded by companions of the trek,
Who tell me stories of legend
but seem to me to be memories.
We cannot change our fate,
yet that is what I am trying to do,
however I know not what it is.
Can she guide me ?
Will she see the hidden paths
just off the naked caress ?
Can she resist the temptation
of the mortal abyss ?
I am confused as I sit here,
ruddy glow, fire in my eyes.
Need I some support,
for the night is long
and nights desolate me
until the sun awakens.

© copyright Daniel Marr 1995

d r e a m s

I have turned and fled
I have run and wept
The burning footprints follow
From you to my door
Don't come in
Let me alone, mine to cry
For a cup of nature's dew
And a love to share the cavern
The fire-rimmed dark
Dank and deeply cold hole
The pit of despair
I think we lost ourselves
Yet I am me
Who are you ?
My crystal vase is upon the rock
Its fragments pieces of mind
Shattered on the heartless rock
With none left whole
I am still warm
wrapped in my all-consuming
My magnificent and abiding love
Like a lake of cold deep
As strong as the mountain's
Sullen head hanging above
I don't change
I can wrap you in tight
Too tight to breathe
Or I can give you the freedom
Of paddling on the surface
Don't just stand there on the shore
Not leaving and going home
Yet gazing wistfully at my still beauty
But complaining that you can't swim
So ! Do you really think that
I would let you drown
As deep as I go there
Is still a firm bottom to stand on
Can you go this deep ?
To where self and selfless become one
To where emotions are tangible
Can you stand in your space
Of emptiness and circling colours ?
Can you see the one who is inside
And are you repelled ?
Is she an ugly hideous hag ?
Shall you go insane ?
Yet here sanity has no meaning
Nor has time
Only existence and love of being
And nights of sumptuous black and grey
Turning corridors of your internal maze
Yet meeting featureless wall
Upon my face
Searching for a door
In the cold white misty rift
That will lead me to your name
Your real name
With no lies and no disguise
Are you ashamed of it ?
For you deny its existence to me
But its too late now
For you are inside me
Changing what I am
And planting seeds of doubt
And self denial in my mind
I am lost for if I doubt my reasons
And my morality
I doubt my life
And that is all that I have
That is mine
No pride, no self-worth
No hate or terror
Or nightmares of the past
Just me and the sun in its glory
And the moon in its time of sorrow
Take away the light and I will crumble
Like the salty sand castle
Built in the summer heat
And the cloud dancers in the sky
Live and love
Learn to try and fade away

© copyright Daniel Marr 1995

s o d s o f d a y

dark souls on the downward voyage
to hell and depths they seem forgotten
dreary eyed and slack of mind
pale of face and dead
vacant and dead
what is it they offer
to those that have gone before
a new hope
a tale of joy
a bold new vision of the future
or more of that damned reality
the dullness that deals our day
with random arrogance
the diamonds and hearts mixed with the spades
that dig the earth to lie in
a bed of dirt
and a quilt of soil
Damned reality lurking around the corner of our dreams
insiduously creeping
never sleeping but stealing
the hopes of busy men

Idle days are never now apparent
what is idle anyway?
what is leisure?
is that the dreamless sleep
that never seems enough?
is that the hurried kiss and the meals missed?
why now are the days less than before?
why must we keep alive the spirit of youth
when the cruel old man eats us alive

Curse and cry demons wept
whether our souls are our own or not
whether life ever gives us back what we gave it
till it is too decayed to use
and our fingers can no longer grip
or our eyes see to point

Plight of tragedy
incomparable grief
to live the days as it demands
and never change the color of our sky
or the shade of our sun.

The choice is made
the skies are swept clean
the new days unfold in triumphant procession
we conquer life
we cheat death
we celebrate the infinitely possible
we hug and cry and laugh
to never bow and scape
to never hide but always dare to try
is now our parade

Dance to me of earth
sing to me of shadows gone
speak to me in universal harmony
touch with me the rainbows song
look to the blessed east
feel the beating again of my heart
the pulse of my night has resufaced
no more am I bound by chains
no more is my desert bleak
its water runs with me
its fields call me to play
its trees uphold and protect me
I am earth
I am moon
I am sun and I am rain
I turn in my sleep and dream of life

Again I speak to you
again I kiss you
again I give you another day
all I ask is as before
When blue shadows hold you
and black days hug you cold
remember the spirit of sorrow's death
remember the eternal day of joy
remember me always
and listen to me smile

© copyright Daniel Marr 1995

r e i n c a r n a t i o n

If you want life...take mine
If you want to dream...sleep for me
If you want to see colors..steal my eyes
If you want to hear the music of the earth...cut off my ears and place them on yours
If you want to write in a parched landscape
If you want to stand in the void of white and liven it up
If you want to cry of the time when life inspired you
If you want to speak in the tongues of nations
If you want to learn the lesson well...

...then live my life and dream my dreams and cry my tears and scream my fears
...and play my song till the dying is done
...and we are once again left to face the dawn of night
when our life in perspective seem dim
and the cold reality of day's new hush is apparent
and the gleam of the gun metal is bright
take that trip to the darkest side
to see the new age through a new birth and a new face...

...Reincarnate thyself.

© copyright Daniel Marr 1995

m i s t

Your promises are dear to me
and your sweet sweet words keep me warm
Your shadow form is real to me
and your ghostly arms hold me tight.
Your hands feel strange - like the grip of the sea
They pull me in and threaten to drown
Your eyes blind me and the fires of the sun shines from them

You invade my mind and steal my thoughts
You rip my flesh and laugh at my pain
You leave me standing alone in the dawn
to face by myself the growling day
Your roses' scent fills my nose
Your perfume a subtle harmony of light
The thorns which you keep well hidden
are now revealed to me

Your poison is lethal
Your words are carefully barbed arrows of thought
They strike deep and are hard to remove
And a pound of flesh I pay for each

The principles of our love are the same
We shall do it until we can do it no more
When the skies cloud and the helldog appears
And the night cloaks my day once more.
What is life without your presence
What is a song without a voice
What is a student without a master
What is a painter without a brush
What is life everafter but a sorrow
A fragmented fading dream of the past
when I loved you and was lost
When the storm broke apart my ship
When the waves of chance dashed my hopes of rescue
And your heart hardened within

Know that I never left you
Know that our journey together is not yet done
You are still in sight on the horizon
And I will lash my crew and ask for more sail
With the wind of change a coming
And the gates of hell wide open
The time of living is for the strong
and ardent of desire.

My flaming rose
my cruel jailer
my gentle healer
my prison cell
my sister and my mother
my lover and my friend
my saviour and my death
my heart is now bared open
and easy to wound

Sheath your talons
oh eagle above the sea
I am not fickle in loving
and fall easy pray to grief
Think of the pain before you strike the blow
Then lash with all your might
Do it all in an orgy of anger
and let the blood red haze take over.

Hear the song in the air
She went away and came back
He hated and loved his princess
he cried at night until he knew
then was comforted by the crows
Memory and Sorrow came to him
from the shoulders of old man time
whispered words of power in his ears
and raised him from the dust.

Here I will stand
Here I will fight no more
I am worn thin by the rain
and starved by the floods
I will rest and take your hand
and then run with you
to where twilight never comes.

© copyright Daniel Marr 1995

u n t i t l e d

here I stand .. here i will fight no more...my head will tie me to the ground.. and the blood will pour from the wounds in the earth...mother dearest...can you pray for me...as my heart is kept in a box of chains...my soul wont rest for my bird has flown.. upon the eagles wings it rides...and it takes the sun from my mountain... and shades my desert of lush greenery..be it fine for the swift falcon..in whose proud stare you saw life...but the gentle dove and the albatross of love...that will ever fly and never land...is brought to shame by the net...that was so cunningly laid..and faithfully tossed...and broke his wings of truth

© copyright Daniel Marr 1995

l i f e

Do it ! Do it now,
Lest it be gone.
The moment passed,
The morning come.
The tide has ebbed,
Into the day we're flung,
While with artistic haste
They still paint the canvas of night.

© copyright Daniel Marr 1995

c h i l d r e n

When our summer's gone and it's almost dark
There will be a child playing upon the hill.
And the mistress of the mountain shall know
Where the starlight goes after it gleams in her hair.

© copyright Daniel Marr 1995

m y f r i e n d

When the nights are shadowed
and the moon's full glow shrouded,
when you lie cold, huddled and cloaked
seek the warmth of the fire

that is me.

When you climb your mountain
and outwit all those chasing you,
when you struggle and finally triumph
to the top of that windy peak
brace yourself to the rock

that is me.

When the stones are thrown
Their cruel truths and lies still sharp,
flung from your lover's hand
seek shelter behind the wall

that is me.

Whenever you feel lost, alone or afraid
when the spirit has deserted you,
when a helping hand cannot be found
find cheer and comfort in the smile and voice

that is me.

When at storm's break
when the whirlpool of emotions
fling you about, aimlessly here and there,
grab on with both hands
to that safety line

that is me.

When the rain falls with the tears
when the joy has gone
and grief is visiting,
when he loves you not
and has sought another,
when you have buried them
and will see them no more,
when the tide of time
has ebbed from the sunny shore
exposing the jagged rocks
and the beach is cold
and the water no longer looks inviting,
when you are tired and long to rest
and seek sanctuary
to give care-free ease,
when you just have need
turn to the hug of a friend

that is me.

© copyright Daniel Marr 1995

u n t i t l e d

What wondrous foe did you defeat today ?
What brave and fearful warrior did you slay ?
What bright and noble deed did you perform ?
What sacrifice did you give ?
What perfect and lovely breast did you cry upon ?
What beautiful women swooned at your name ?
What stirring song did you sing in battle ?
What amazing tale will you tell ?

None. I lived today
the best I could,
I tore each moment
and wrung it full.
I gave thanks to the One
for the chance to see the sun.
I stood on the hill
and breathed in the air.
I took the time
to stop and look around.
I wished each one I met,
a good and gracious day.
I gave comfort if I could,
but did not stop to stay.

A sprite-like existence is best.
To flit in, smile and laugh,
then fly away again.
Damn the recriminations
of commitment and grief.
Dance the waltz of life,
with dalliance, my dear.
Don't stay too long, however,
or that canny spider,
with glittery eyes,
well hidden in mortal disguise,
will swoop unexpectedly from above,
and with loops of silver tears,
will tie you up with love.

© copyright Daniel Marr 1995

y o u a n d h e

Stand in the light, pretty one.
Shadow the moon,
and sister the night.
Orphan the star's first glimmer,
to bury your universe inside.

What I see in my mind is mine forever;
no one can steal its golden cover,
no one can mark its pure snow,
no one can invade the crimson castle,
no one can bring my banner low.
This life is mine eternal,
all others are given for my play.
My spirit sings in harmony,
with the glorious ghost song of the stars.

The earth cries of her rape;
the wolf howls to greet its prey.
The eagle dances only in death,
when his worn-out cloak of feathers
falls to the dusty ground.

But sorrow overcomes despair
when you find the god-like child.
Who is hidden in the mirror's torment;
whose name is inscribed in your heart.

c o n t o r t i o n

Writhing in the jungle
Calling out to the soft morning
as the trees shake their heads awake
And the hush starts to break
World is turning and the fires are coming
A life for a life
and the pain is still strong
What is my love but my history
What is my experience but dust on my path
The forks are becoming more frequent now
The turnings and convolutions more confusing
Intricacies upon enigma and mystery
Why did you step into my life?
Why did you play my harp like your own
Your sirens song is alluring
And my ship is breaking on the reef

Need I some comfort in laughter
Need I some warm sun in my day
I cannot stem the flood of tears
And cannot swim against the tide
I climb out on the branches to pick the fruit
but they break and I fall to the ground.

If, my heart, our paths do meet
How do we greet?
Do I cry or try to hide?
Will you accept my need?
Will I compromise my mind?
Will I die inside?
I know not and will not
until the night is dawn
and I awake with my soul in my arms.

© copyright Daniel Marr 1995

q u e e n o f l i f e

I am the Bard
I am the caresser of your soul
and the speaker of truths
I am the golden glints in your hair
and the red on your lips
I am the gleam in your eyes
when you wakes in the night
I am the lingering memory of a body
That was beside in last night's dream
I ride the dragon to save you
I take his hot breath as my own
I challenge the demons in their lairs
and hunt the vampires of the air.
I am the morning smile
I am the goodnight kiss
I am the one who's subtle humour
invades your soul to make you laugh
I am the frozen snow that shines so white in the sun
I am the breeze that dries you warm
I am the tear that courses your cheek
And the reason for the world's demise

I am the singer
You are the song
I am the poet
You are the verse
I am the canvas
You are the colours
I am the shadow
And you are the light

My destiny lies with you my spirit child
We are tied by bonds that cannot break
Your pain is mine as is your joy
I will keep you safe
And protect your realm
and kiss you softly
and hold you dear.

s a d n e s s

When the fitfull sleep of the dead intrudes into the life of the young...when the storm of hate nails my mind to the wall.. when my heart grows heavy with the splinters of my cross....if my brow breaks sweat before I wake..if my veins boil and steam...and my heart pounds and the demons of night...that claw and hate and bite... see me as easy prey..and gather around drooling..then shall I wake and remember none...see the new day give birth to the sun..and frolick in my arcadian mist...run naked between raindrops...and swim in the mountain springs....

b a r s a n d c h a i n s

What promises does my angel keep,
When she visits me in my clouded dreams ?
And sets me afire with rampant desire,
And chains me to my heart.
Why do I feel so light when she calls me ?
Drifting like smoke through the bars of my cell
Spiraling upwards to the light that she is.

Blacker moods have done me in,
The light falls away from my window and I fall too
Down to the stone and dusty floor.
Here again where I wearily carve my initials in the rock
Here where I play with the rats and damp
Here where my nightmares grip me in cold tourture.
Writhing, twisting, agony!

Outside I can see the temple
Its white and holy walls rise to keep me out.
It is not a sanctuary but a prison
A sanitarium for those who need their souls
A rope with which to hang their life upon
And a millstone to tie around their necks.
The monks of sin are calling me in
Their brown tattered robes stream behind them in the wind.
Their dirge-like voices are keening in the frosty air
Their pale shadows in the dim mist behind them.
Let me alone, I cry
Leave me be to my torment without your cursed touch
Look not down on me with that insincere pity
And weep not at my demise.

Go you bastard sons of pilgrims.
Go you blackest crows of night.
Your precence once brought me comfort
But now it robs me of the sun
I smash at them with my fists
I break their bones as I break my own
I claw the heartless walls of stone
Till my fingers leave bloody smears upon the door
Screaming until I can cry no more.

Again they lean down and whisper
Again their words not designed to soothe.
But stir that passion
To boil the blood
To make the haze intrude and the adrenalin rush !

GO ! I shout and smite them
LEAVE! I command, I curse them,
From their shaded brow to their putrid feet
MOCK ME NO MORE YOU SHACKLED SONS OF SATAN !
And I step boldly out the door
Which stood forever open
and never stopped my leave.
It was I who kept me inside
And tied my life to the tree.

Outside spring is returning
Inside the walls crumble to dust
Outside the fear is lessened
and the pain slowly goes away.

Where is that Bardic fellow
That rampant maker of laws
The teller of tales and weaver of lies
The loremaster of us all?
Has he forgotten his purpose,
has he forgotten his faith ?
His creed kept many a life honest
and his deeds inspired many a man to shame.

I have found him, the lowly man
Tucked away and hidden by mist
Crouched under the blanket of time
and his silver voice rusted by disuse.
How shall I cure his madness?
How shall I make him return ?
With mocking words and fickle laughter,
With angry denial and lashing of tongue ?

No! look see there he cringes.
Look there he cowers his head.
Only soft and loving touches shall he care for
Until the tempest is soothed.
Treat him like a dumb animal
Wounded by some great beast
Suckle him and soothe him.
Speak to him with love and kindness.
For the beast he battled was not of this earth's making.
Nor was it fought on this world's dirt.
But inside his soul he fought his brother
Who is himself but misunderstood.
He has faced that fiercest of foes,
He has conquered him who cannot yield.
He has assailed and won the highest mountain.
He has crossed the parchest desert,
And wandered in the endless wood.
His prize is not one of greatness,
nor riches or tales of gore.
He cannot carry his trophy home,
yet it is displayed for all to see.

His memory of the darkest time
grows dim along with the hate.
His smile returns to bless his day
And he has once again his soul.

He is the exile cometh home,
He is the lost lamb found.
He is the man of many layers,
And in each he is whole.
He has purged the sickness,
He has cured the guilt of his death,
He has spoken with love to his familiar,
and he will once again go forth.

He will tell tales of wonder,
He will sail upon the sea of fate,
His fickle horse called chance beneath him,
He will again seek his forgiveness,
dry her tears and tend her wounds
and make her smile once more.

© copyright Daniel Marr 1995